The Diana Ross song keeps on playing in my head whenever I think about my Groshong catheter. I'm pretty bruised, but I feel so free. I even got teary eyed during my first normal shower. It's the little things that you miss the most.
So I'll quickly explain how it went down. I got to the surgery clinic and the nurse escorted me into my room. She was explaining how they were going to make an incision and I would need stitches. I said, "STITCHES?!? Can't you just pull the sucker out of the hole that's already there? Why do you need to make an incision?" The nurse reassured me that it was going to be a tiny incision and would only require a few stitches. Butterflies in my tummy started doing flips at this point. (Plus I read the Lance Armstrong book and he had a horrible experience with his Groshong removal.) Turns out I was mistakenly scheduled for a port-a-cath removal which is a different line that is placed beneath your skin. Luckily that got cleared up as soon as the surgeon took one look at my Groshong.
I laid on the bed as the surgeon gave me shots of local anesthesia so the area would be numb. It felt like I was getting stung by tiny bees.
The surgeon felt around to see how far the "cuff" was in my vein and she said that she could feel it close to the exit site. The cuff is basically a donut-like stopper around a part of the tube that's underneath my skin. The cuff ensures that the tube doesn't accidentally slip out of the incision point on my chest. Since I had the tube for almost a whole year the surgeon suspected that my tissue fibers had attached themselves to the tube. She said this might make it hard to pull the tube out. That was an understatement.
She removed the stitches and then started to tug on the tube. For some people, all it takes is a tug and the tube slips out. For Michelle Maykin, the surgeon had to yank, yank, YANK. She even made the incision point wider with a scalpel a few times. I felt like I was fish on a hook because every time she pulled the tube my whole body was lifted from the table. Luckily I felt very little pain, but it seemed like it was taking forever with no progress. That sucker would not budge. Midway through, I even asked the nurse to hold my hand because it was freaking me out a little bit. After 10+ tries the cuff finally came out and the rest of the tube slipped out easily.
It was a pretty surreal experience to be awake while the procedure was taking place. If I had to do that again (knock on wood)...I would definitely opt for more drugs so I'm not as alert. Boy am I glad it's over. Now I have just a few war wounds (scars) that remind me of my battle with Leuk instead of an entire foot long tube dangling out of my chest. I feel so free.... fantastically liberating.
I asked the surgeon if I could keep the tube, but she said that I couldn't have it because it was deemed "hazardous." I thought, "Um..hello?? It's been in my chest for the last year...if it hasn't harmed me yet...I doubt it could be hazardous to me now." She still didn't want to give it to me but she gave me a consolation prize by letting me take a picture of it with my camera phone. The red blob is the cuff. The end of the tube to the cuff is the part that was inside my vein. From the cuff to the two blue caps is the part that was outside of my chest.
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